This month we have a ladder match and an Ultimate X match featuring X Division competitors. Not even horrible booking can stop this show from being great! Folks, that last sentence can be found under the word “lie” in the dictionary.
Opening Match: Ladder Match: Brian Kendrick vs. Amazing Red vs. Daniels vs. Kazarian
The winner of this match will be the #1 contender for the X Division Title. Kazarian catches Daniels with a leg lariat and clotheslines him to the floor. Red follows out with a corkscrew dive. Kendrick brings a ladder into the ring but Kazarian stops him from climbing. Red dropkicks the ladder into Daniels. Kendrick slingshots Kazarian onto the ladder but falls victim to an STO from Daniels. Red drop toe holds Daniels into the ladder. Kendrick props up the ladder between the apron and guardrail but Kazarian gourdbusters him onto it. Daniels puts Kazarian on the ladder and lands a split-legged moonsault. Red ascends the top rope and hurricanranas Daniels off the ladder. Red and Kazarian battle on top of the ladder in the ring but Kendrick pushes it over. Kazarian slingshot leg drops Daniels onto the ladder. Red matrixes to avoid a ladder and kicks it into Kazarian’s face. Daniels levels Red with a clothesline and suplexes him onto a ladder. He then proceeds to back drop Kazarian onto the same ladder. Kendrick takes over but Daniels sends him into a ladder. Daniels catches Kazarian with a sick powerbomb onto a ladder draped across the middle rope. Kendrick back drops Red to the floor but Kazarian catches him with a flatliner. Red slingshots him but gets laid out with an ace crusher from Kazarian. Kendrick hits sliced bread on Kazarian. Daniels hits a death valley driver on Kendrick. Red and Daniels battle on two ladders. Daniels hits a uranagi from the ladder. Kazarian springboards onto the ladders, fights off Kendrick and Daniels, and grabs the contract at 13:39. This match will receive a good rating due to the innovative and fluid ladder spots. Unfortunately, there were some factors working against it. They could have used more time, but then again, TNA could have made this match shorter. Additionally, this match had nearly no build. So although I didn’t have much reason to care, the competitors got this match over due to sheer force of talent. Ironically enough, Kazarian/Williams is setup…a match that was supposed to happen on this show. ***
Chelsea (Desmond Wolfe’s assistant) brings out Ric Flair in a wheelchair. He is not a happy man. The man has crashed in an airplane, but has never been in a wheelchair. He blames Hulk Hogan and Abyss. Tonight, they will pay for demobilizing Flair. This whole promo was just Ric being Ric.
Hogan and Abyss are backstage. Abyss feels the power and Hogan reassures him that he will have gold around his waist soon enough. Eric Bischoff walks in with a baseball hat on. Hogan tells him not to make things personal. Bischoff says that he’ll take care of it by the end of the week.
Match #2: TNA Knockouts Title: Tara © vs. Daffney
They start brawling immediately. Tara hits a suplex along with a standing moonsault. Daffney sends her into the turnbuckles and utilizes some stomps. Tara avoids a charge and applies an octopus hold in the ropes. Daffney regains control until Tara connects with an enzuigiri. Tara hits a spinebuster but Daffney answers with a northern lights suplex. Tara finds success with a spinning side slam. Daffney throws her to the floor and rams her into the guardrail. Tara dodges a belt shot and hits the Widow’s Peak to retain her title at 6:44. Not bad actually. They had the right idea by putting over their hatred for each other from the start and built to some decent exchanges towards the end. This feud will continue, as Daffney stole Tara’s tarantula after the match. **
Christy Hemme is with Brutus Magnus. From now on, he wants to be known as Magnus. He brought Rob Terry into TNA and will show Terry why he’s in over his head.
Match #3: TNA Global Title: Rob Terry © vs. Magnus
Terry just looks like an idiot walking to the ring. He clotheslines Magnus to the floor. Back in, Terry catches Magnus with a slam. Magnus walks into a spin kick. TERRY HULKS UP!! He hits a spinebuster to retain his title at 1:25. Almost painful to watch. This is a case of Terry having very little upside and Magnus having some useful qualities about him. I don’t know if I’m glad this was short or upset that Magnus got buried. Actually, why was this even on the card? ¼*
Christy Hemme is with the Motor City Machine Guns. Sabin says that Generation Me aren’t on their level. The MCMG will give them nightmares. Shelley references the Hardy Boys and says that nothing will keep them from their destiny.
Match #4: Ultimate X: Chris Sabin and Alex Shelley vs. Jeremy and Max Buck
The winner of this match will become the #1 contenders for the TNA Tag Team Titles. Max launches Jeremy into a dropkick on Shelley and Generation Me connect with stereo dropkicks on Sabin. Sabin catches Max with a kick and the MCMG take over with double teaming on Jeremy. The MCMG lay out Max with a doomsday crossbody on the outside. Jeremy manages to fight them off for awhile but ultimately falls victim to their double teams. Max comes back with a double dropkick and Jeremy lands a dive to the floor. Max spears Shelley and Generation Me follow with their moonsault-frog splash combination. Jeremy hits a slingshot facebuster on Sabin and lands a moonsault to the floor on Shelley. Sabin uses Max as a springboard to stop Jeremy from retrieving the X. Shelley lays out Max with a tornado DDT but eats a superkick from Jeremy. Sabin takes out Jeremy with a clothesline but falls victim to a facebuster from Max. Everyone climbs along a cable but no one can hang on. Generation Me gains the advantage with kicks. Jeremy lands a swantan on Shelley and dives out to the floor onto Sabin. Shelley overhead suplexes Jeremy into Max. The MCMG hit sliced bread on Max. Sabin and Jeremy climb the cables. Sabin fights off Jeremy and grabs the X at 12:03. Fantastic showing from both teams. This was just crazy action from start to finish. And to be honest, it kind of had to be, considering the match only received twelve minutes. If anyone has seen their match from PWG Ninety-Nine, you know what to expect from this contest. I’m glad that the MCMG will get a title shot and I hope TNA doesn’t screw up the booking of Generation Me. They are over because of their moveset and TNA should take advantage of that. ***¼
Jeremy Borash is with Sean Waltman and Scott Hall. A useless promo follows.
Match #5: Kevin Nash and Eric Young vs. Scott Hall and Sean Waltman
If Hall and Waltman win, they will receive TNA contracts. Young catches Waltman with some offense early on but walks into a spin kick. Hall tags in and doesn’t look terrible. Young and Waltman botch a back drop and Waltman lands a dive to the floor. Young crotches him on the ringpost but gets caught with a clothesline by Hall. The Band isolate Young. Waltman goes to the floor, looks for spray paint, can’t find it, drops the f bomb, and then eventually finds it. He spray paints Young in the face and the referee does nothing about it. YOUNG MAKES THE TAG…NASH POWERBOMBS YOUNG!!! NO ONE CARES AT ALL!!! Waltman hits the X-Factor and Hall adds the Razor’s Edge on Young for the win at 7:56. Hilariously bad. From Waltman not being able to find the spray paint to Nash making the most predictable turn in recent memory, there was nothing to enjoy here. Mike Tenay: “They’re not b-a-n-n-e-d for life, but they are The Band for life”. I hate this. DUD
Jeremy Borash is with Kurt Angle. He holds up the dog tags and burns a picture of Mr. Anderson. Clearly going for the “less is more” approach.
Match #6: X Division Title: Doug Williams © vs. Shannon Moore
The spray paint markings from the previous atrocity are still on the canvas. Moore surprises Williams early with some offense. Moore comes off the top with a hurricanrana. He goes up top again but Williams knocks him off, gaining control. Williams hits a gutwrench suplex and a running knee. Moore comes back with a wheelbarrow bulldog followed by a corkscrew from the top. He connects with a baseball slide and lands a crossbody to the floor. While on the outside, Williams grabs a brick from under the ring. Williams uses the brick behind the referee’s back to retain his title at 6:20. Did we really need to protect Moore this much? A brick? For a pay per view that is supposed to showcase the X Division, you would think that the X Division Title match would be something special. These two worked well and tried their best. But with six minutes and a brick for a finish, the terrible booking took over. *¾
Williams cuts a promo after the match. He says that Moore represents everything that he hates about the X Division. The division should be about technical wrestling. Acrobats belong in the circus. He grabs lipstick from someone in the crowd and draws on Moore’s face.
Match #7: TNA Tag Team Titles: Matt Morgan and Hernandez © vs. James Storm and Robert Roode
The champions start arguing before the action even begins. Roode catches Hernandez with a running forearm, so Morgan tags in. Morgan hits a side slam and tags Hernandez back in to prove himself. Hernandez finds success with a long delayed vertical suplex on Storm. Morgan tags himself in and lands a double crossbody on Beer Money. Hernandez shoulder blocks Roode to the floor but Morgan stops him from diving. Roode hits a blockbuster on Hernandez and Beer Money isolate him. Hernandez connects with a slingshot shoulder block on Storm and makes the hot tag. Morgan cleans house, hitting a discus clothesline on Roode. Hernandez lands a dive to the floor onto Roode. Morgan yells at Hernandez and throws him back into the ring. Storm “accidentally” spits beer at Morgan. Hernandez hits a dominator on Storm to retain the titles at 11:22. This is a match that should have happened on Impact. Although Morgan is great in his current role, we’ve seen the “partners that don’t get along” angle so much in TNA that it’s just old now. Believe it or not, Morgan carried the match with his antics in the ring and on the apron. There wasn’t anything significant happening wrestling-wise and this match was strictly used for storyline purposes. **
Morgan lays out Hernandez after the match with the Carbon Footprint and poses with both belts.
Match #8: Mr. Anderson vs. Kurt Angle
Angle holds onto a side headlock. SMELL THE HATRED! He invites Anderson to try his luck with a headlock. Anderson gives it a shot but is quickly shaken off. He tries a second time to no avail. Anderson smartens up and just kicks Angle but falls victim to a back suplex. Angle connects with corner punches and hits a suplex. Anderson drapes his left arm across the top rope and takes over. He works over the left arm until Angle comes back with a belly-to-belly suplex. Anderson escapes the Angle Slam and hits a finlay roll. Angle responds with rolling german suplexes and hits the Angle Slam. He synchs in an ankle lock. Anderson rolls out and sneaks in a low blow. He hits the Mic Check for a two count. Anderson goes for another one from the top but Angle fights him off and lands a frog splash. Anderson armdrags out of an Angle Slam attempt and Angle accidentally clotheslines the referee. Anderson hits the Angle Slam but there’s no referee. He brings a chair into the ring but ultimately decides to use the dog tags. Angle dodges the shot and hits a german suplex. He uses the dog tags to bust Anderson open. Angle reigns down with punches and synchs in an ankle lock for the victory at 17:35. I hated how they started with a side headlock of all moves. After all that Anderson did to disrespect the troops, Angle should have been wanting to kill him. Based on the first five minutes of this match, that wasn’t the case. The rest of the match was fine for setting up a rematch at Lockdown, but we definitely didn’t see what these two are fully capable of with this contest. **½
Anderson gets on his microphone after the match. He says that Angle isn’t a real American and had to cheat to win the match. Clearly, this is far from over.
Christy Hemme is with AJ Styles. He is ready to defend his title tonight and teach Abyss a lesson in the process. The result will be the same as it’s always been: Styles beats Abyss.
Jeremy Borash is with Abyss. He says that while Styles has Flair, he has the power of the Hulkamaniacs.
Match #9: TNA World Title: AJ Styles © vs. Abyss
Abyss attacks during the introductions. He connects with some shots and kind of military presses Styles. Styles tries some chops to no avail and gets sent onto the entrance ramp. Ric Flair is out, still in his wheelchair. Styles comes back with an enzuigiri. Abyss catches him off a charge with a HUGE belly-to-belly suplex back into the ring. Styles starts targeting the left leg. He knocks Abyss off the apron and follows out with a dive. Styles brings a chair into the ring and props it between the middle and top rope. He takes over until Abyss hits a side slam. Styles connects with a pele kick and follows with a springboard forearm. Abyss catapults him into the propped up chair in the corner and hits Shock Treatment. Styles knocks Abyss off the top rope and lands the spiral tap. Styles argues with the referee and walks into the Black Hole Slam for a nearfall. Flair sprays something into the referee’s face. Styles low blows Abyss and lays him out with a belt shot. Hulk Hogan is out! He brings Earl Hebner and wheels away Flair. Styles lands a springboard 450…ABYSS HULKS UP AND CHOKESLAMS STYLES THROUGH THE RING!!! The referee calls for the bell. Hogan awards Abyss the title but Hebner takes it away. Flair wheels back out but Abyss grabs him. Hebner trips and Abyss accidentally falls into the hole. Hogan sprays Flair. Desmond Wolfe runs out but gets sprayed and falls into the hole. FLAIR STUMBLES INTO THE HOLE!! TNA! TNA! TNA! Abyss and Hogan celebrate to end the show. Call this a no contest at 14:56. This match obviously wasn’t meant to be taken seriously. The stunt at the end was beyond terrible. It was actually sad to watch Flair out there, especially considering his proper farewell by the WWE just under two years ago. I’ll rate this match based on the action before the dumb finish. It was actually pretty good and setup a strong finishing stretch. Too bad that didn’t happen. **
Overall: Same story, different pay per view. TNA truly shot itself in the foot with their booking here. Some of the highlights include:
-Rob Terry squashing Magnus, a wrestler with a larger upside than Terry himself.
-The most predictable turn in recent memory that was setup by a horrible match.
-The X Division Title match receiving six minutes when this is supposed to be a pay per view to showcase the X Division.
-Matt Morgan attacking Hernandez after a SUCCESSFUL title defense. Yes, our tag team champions hate each other.
-Everything that happened after Abyss slammed Styles through the ring.
Fortunately, the X Division shined a little bit. The ladder and Ultimate X matches came through despite their time constraints. Unfortunately, they stand out because everything else on the card was bad or average. Don’t waste your time with this show.
