This week: We interrupt Raw to bring you local programming, for the Boston area. The Rock does a tour of Boston and doesn’t spare us the history lesson, in a truly revolutionary build to Wrestlemania. Then it’s over to John Cena, with your New England sports round up. Everything you wanted to know about Boston and then a little bit more on top. Patriots, Tea Party, the Harbor. And yet, no mention of More Than A Feeling? Talk about missing out the most important part. Plus Shawn sees into the future, The Milan Miracle 2, Rosa Mendes and her skin tight shorts, John Laurinaitis and his skin tight pants and Drew finally finds an opponent he can beat.
RAW SUPERSHOW
– Shawn Michaels came out to start the show. Shawn said things got heated between him and HHH last time he was on Raw, but that was just because he wanted him to take the match so bad. He said it was water under the bridge and now he’d changed his mind. Shawn seemed excited. He called Triple H out, to figure out what changed his mind. They hugged and Shawn was all buddy buddy. He said they’d been friends for years and he put that on the line to get HHH to accept, but HHH wouldn’t buckle, because he was a man of integrity. He even called him a coward and he did nothing. Shawn wanted to know what made HHH change his mind. HHH tried to answer, but Shawn introduced a clip instead, of HHH accepting the match because Undertaker claimed Shawn was better than him. They cut back and Shawn was no longer in a good mood. The crowd chanted “Shawn is better”. HHH claimed it had nothing to do with who’s better between them. He said he was tired of people saying Shawn was a failure for not beating Undertaker and that’s why he accepted. He said he was going to finish Undertaker off for Shawn. Shawn brought up telling HHH he couldn’t win last year and he was right. And this year, he knew who was going to win and he’d be right again. Shawn went to leave, but came back and said the reason he knew was that he’d be the special referee at Wrestlemania.
– United States Championship: Santino Marella d. Jack Swagger (c) in 3:03 to win the title. Teddy Long was in charge of Raw of course, so Cole claimed favouritism. Laurinaitis and Otunga came to the ring to watch. Santino went for the Cobra but Otunga distracted the referee and Ziggler clotheslined Santino. Swagger quickly hit the gutwrench powerbomb, but Santino kicked out. Teddy’s music hit and he came out with Aksana and Kofi Kingston to even things up. Teddy pulled Laurinaitis off the apron and as they argued, Ziggler hit Santino again. Ziggler was hit with the Cobra after Kofi distracted him. Aksana shoved Vickie down. Swagger put Santino in the ankle lock as Teddy shoved Laurinaitis down. Santino then countered the ankle lock and rolled Swagger up to win the title. Crowd reacted big for that. Laurinaitis tried to reverse the decision claiming this was his show, but Teddy said he was in charge and had security throw Laurinaitis and Otunga out. Santino wept and everybody did the trombone. This segment really worked well.
– The Rock had “history lessons” throughout the night. The first one was Rock at Boston Harbor. He compared Cena to the British and talked about the American Revolution. Rock recreated the Boston Tea Party, by throwing Cena merchandise into the water. T-shirts, alarm clocks, garden gnomes, wristbands and John Cena cologne all went into the water, with Rock insulting Cena along the way. He said everybody was sick of Cena’s stuff being shoved down their throats and the revolution had begun tonight. He told someone off screen to get in a row boat and clear up the mess he’d made. This may have been the best thing Rock’s done since coming back.
– Eve Torres d. Alicia Fox in 0:35. Kelly Kelly did commentary. Eve’s theme music remains intact for another week. The crowd tried to get on Eve’s case. But she won quick with a legsweep. Zack came out, walking with a cane. Zack said he was glad they never hooked up, because as they say, Broskis before Hoeskis. After the break, Eve caught up with Zack backstage and kissed him and poor Zack was smitten.
– They showed a promo taped earlier, with Cena sat in the empty arena. Cena said him and Rock was more than a match, it was a once in a lifetime opportunity. He said Rock was the most successful star in WWE history. Cena said he wasn’t going to be honoured just to be Rock’s opponent, he needed to win. Cena talked about Boston being the city of champions. He brought up the Patriots going 18-0 only to lose in the Superbowl. Cena said he’d done great things in WWE and he was proud of them, but Wrestlemania 28 was everything and if he didn’t win, he’d be just another name on Rock’s list. But if he won, at Wrestlemania, in Rock’s hometown, he’d win the big one. He said no-one would remember second place and that’s why he had to win.
– Daniel Bryan and Chris Jericho d. CM Punk and Sheamus (Jericho pinned Punk) in 8:42. Somebody had a “Colt Of Personality” sign in the front row. Cute. Punk and Jericho started and Jericho tried and failed to get the advantage, forcing Jericho to tag out. Sheamus and Bryan squared off as well, with similarly bad results. A kick from the apron to Punk’s injured back allowed Jericho and Bryan to take control. Sheamus got the tag and ran through Jericho, but Bryan attacked Sheamus with a dropkick outside to cut him off. Punk came back in and ran wild on Bryan despite his bad back. Things broke down, leading to Jericho saving Bryan from a Celtic Cross and reversing a cradle from Punk for the pin.
– Rock’s second history lesson, saying if John Cena had ridden through Boston shouting “the British are coming” they’d have shot him on sight for looking stupid. He said if Cena was leading the revolution, they’d all be playing cricket and sipping tea. You could only be so lucky. He slapped down a cardboard cutout and talked about inventing a time machine and inventing electricity. Then he sung Yankee Doodle, with the key line “stuck a feather up his ass and called him a jabroni”. That line about saved this from going nowhere forever.
– Big Show d. The Miz in 2:02. Cody came out immediately to make fun of Big Show, showing a clip of Big Show at Wrestlemania 18, where Show’s Wrestlemania Moment was sitting at WWE New York eating food. Miz attacked a distracted Big Show from behind. Big Show responded by spearing Miz and knocking him out. Ignore the Cody stuff and Miz lasted about 30 seconds at best.
– Rock’s third history lesson. He talked about the American fighting spirit in him. He promised the Rock revolution would overthrow John Cena at Wrestlemania. He said he could entertain anywhere, but there was only one place in the world he could fight and that was WWE. And he said Cena would lose on April 1st, but tonight, he’d get in his face and tell the world what he saw.
– Kane d. R-Truth in 1:26. Truth did an inset promo which was suitably weird. Kane dominated withstood Truth’s brief offence to win with the Chokeslam. Randy Orton then came out and gave Kane an RKO, thanks to Truth grabbing Kane’s ankle, before telling Kane it was “good to be back”, in response to Kane “welcoming” him back on Smackdown.
– Cena came out to a mixed response. He said finally the “real” Rock was back, judging by the history lessons. Cena wondered what Rock was really saying behind all the theatrics. Cena said last week, he told him exactly what his problem was. Crowd chanted “fruity pebbles”, which didn’t answer Cena’s queston. He said Rock was talking about breakfast cereals and who he’d had sex with and wondered if he was fighting The Rock or The Situation. He said Rock was trying way too hard. Cena claimed Rock was “shook up” last week and wasted 20 minutes on Twitter hashtags last week. Which, well, yeah he kinda did didn’t he? Cena said he was the one who shook Rock up and made fun of himself. He said Rock apparently had his swagger back and even though his best stuff had been pre-recorded, he invited Rock to face him, hoping the “real” Rock would come down.
– So The Rock came out. Rock got near Cena and said what he saw was fear. People tried to start a Cena chant and others tried to drown it out with Rock chants. He said Cena was afraid everything he’d done the last 10 years would be gone when he beat him at Wrestlemania. Rock said he saw through Cena. Rock said he had never been more confident in his life. The crowd chanted “Tooth Fairy” at Rock which cut him off. Rock said take away Wrestlemania, Hollywood and all the catchphrases, he was 6 foot 4, 260 pounds of man and he would rip his throat out. And at Cena’s core, he’d always be a little boy, who’d go down in history as Rock’s bitch. Rock got in Cena’s face and Cena didn’t seem concerned. Rock left, as Cena wrote “6’4 260” on his wrist and said he’d have to rip his throat out to beat him, because Rock had other options and if Cena lost, he’d lose everything. Cena said Rock had lost his mind if he thought he was afraid of him. Cena promised to win at Mania and jumped into the crowd with his buddies, before going over to his family in the front row.
NXT
– Striker introduced everyone to NXT and brought Regal into the ring. Regal promised to bring the best show possible and shake things up on NXT. He made Titus versus Percy in the main event before Maxine interrupted. Maxine got flirty with Regal and said she looked forward to working “underneath him”. Regal put her in a match with Tamina.
– Tamina d. Maxine in 3:03. Tamina chased Maxine around the ring and got caught coming back in. Regal had a soliloquy of Depeche Mode song titles prepared this week. Maxine missed a splash and Tamina finished her off with her own superfly splash.
– Hawkins and Reks came out. Hawkins said he should be in charge of the show, not Regal. Reks claimed neither Regal or Striker could get it done in the ring and now they’re just hasbeens. Regal chose to ignore Reks’s speech and brought out a mop and bucket, saying after the way they’ve acted recently, the only job good enough for them would be to clean the toilets. And if they didn’t do it, they’d never be on NXT again. Hawkins and Reks took their mops and left.
– Johnny Curtis d. Yoshi Tatsu in 5:47. Yoshi took Curtis out on the floor, but Curtis managed to hang Yoshi’s arm over the top rope and worked over the arm. And after weathering Yoshi’s fightback, Curtis avoided the spinkick off the top and did the deal with the falcon arrow
– McGillicutty bragged to Striker about his win last week. Tyson showed up and wanted a rematch. McGillicutty said no and it ended up Kidd kneeing McGillicutty in the gut and saying give it some thought and let me know.
– Maxine found Curtis rubbing lotion on himself. Maxine showed up and told him to play along, then started to nibble on his ear as Bateman walked in. Bateman didn’t seem concerned. Maxine said there was a mixed tag next week, with Maxine and Curtis versus Bateman and Kaitlyn. Curtis tried to show some ‘solidarity’ with Maxine and Maxine could take no more and walked off in disgust at him. Hawkins and Reks showed up in janitor uniforms and Percy made fun of them.
– Darren Young d. Jey Uso in 4:43. Jimmy did commentary. After a strong start from Jey, Young cut him off with a powerslam. Jey eventually fought back but missed his charge in the corner and got rolled up.
– Percy Watson d. Titus O’Neil in 5:16. Titus took most of the match. But he couldn’t put Percy away and got frustrated. Percy fought back and countered the sky high, before hitting a flapjack for the win. Hawkins and Reks attacked him after the match and told Regal they were just getting started.
SUPERSTARS
– Justin Gabriel d. Heath Slater in 9:58. The crowd got on Heath’s case because, well, he’s Heath Slater. Slater outwrestled Gabriel early and seemed proud of himself, which didn’t last. Gabriel took over, until Slater crotched Gabriel on the top rope. Slater came very close to winning on a couple of occasions, as did Gabriel with a springboard moonsault. Eventually, Gabriel was able to pull out the 450 for the victory.
– Jinder Mahal d. Ted Dibiase by submission in 4:09. Dibiase got the USA chants going quickly. Jinder went after Dibiase’s still bandaged wrist. Jinder was able to counter Dreamstreet and went on to win with the 1980s stereotype camel clutch.
– Kofi Kingston d. Dolph Ziggler in 13:57. Ziggler gave Scott Stanford his t-shirt. Talent recognising talent. Stanford said Ziggler and Kofi were 99-99 in their series. Scary part is that might be true. Here in match #199, the advantage changed hands repeatedly in the early stages. Kofi gave Ziggler a face first monkey flip for a near fall. Ziggler cut Kofi off going for a springboard to finally get control of the match. And once in control, Ziggler showed off. Kofi got some quick roll ups but Ziggler regained control. Ziggler took too long showing off though, allowing Kofi to make a big comeback. Kofi got a two count with the SOS. Ziggler then got a two count with a reverse powerslam after countering Trouble In Paradise. After avoiding a crossbody, Ziggler then got a closer two with the fame asser. Kofi then fought off the sleeper and won with Trouble In Paradise. Strongest Superstars match in some time.
SMACKDOWN
– Laurinaitis and Otunga were in the ring, as a cage lowered around the ring. Laurinaitis said he was the man who should run both Raw and Smackdown and he was going to prove it, by starting Smackdown with a championship cage match.
– United States Championship, Steel Cage Match: Santino Marella (c) d. Jack Swagger in 7:31. Swagger dominated Santino for a while. Santino tried to escape when he got an opening, but couldn’t and was sent into the cage. The fans got behind Santino and he made a comeback. Santino brought out the Cobra and Ziggler got on the cage, so Santino Cobra’d Ziggler’s hands off the cage and Ziggler was thrown out by the referee. Swagger regained control for a while but got crotched trying to climb out over the top. Swagger prevented Santino from escaping a number of times, eventually getting him in the ankle lock with Santino almost through the door. Swagger told Vickie to hit Santino with the cage door, but Santino countered and Swagger was struck with the door by mistake, allowing Santino to crawl out.
– Laurinaitis wasn’t happy backstage. Otunga tried to calm him down. Teddy came in and Laurinaitis threatened to make Kane versus Aksana. Teddy tried to reason with him. They forced Teddy to apologise for shoving Laurinaitis on Raw. Laurinaitis said that wasn’t good enough and set up a match between Laurinaitis and Teddy. But, if Teddy won, the match with Aksana would be on.
– The fired Drew McIntyre came out, ready to wrestle. Drew said he was here because Laurinaitis knew he was the future and he’d regain his job, if he could beat an opponent of Laurinaitis’s choosing. Great Khali came out, apparently as Drew’s opponent. But Otunga interrupted and said Khali wasn’t the opponent. He told Khali to sit at ringside and brought out Drew’s real opponent, Hornswoggle.
– Drew McIntyre d. Hornswoggle by stoppage in 1:26. Drew gave Hornswoggle a slam, but refused to pin him Then did it again. After a backbreaker, the referee had enough and called for the bell. Meaning Drew has his job back. Khali then laid Drew out with a chop to the head and checked on Hornswoggle.
– Backstage, Aksana pleaded with Teddy. Teddy insisted he knew what he was doing and said Laurinaitis needed to be taught a lesson. Meanwhile, Laurinaitis warmed up in his office.
– Mark Henry d. Ezekial Jackson in 1:41. They hyped Henry going into the International Sports Hall Of Fame. Zeke got some offence in, but Henry won quick with the World’s Strongest Slam.
– Teddy Long d. John Laurinaitis in 2:28. Laurinaitis was looking very ‘aerodynamic’ in his ring attire. Laurinaitis said that Kane was ready and waiting to come out. He told Teddy to be a man and lay down, to not put Aksana in harm’s way. Teddy refused, so Laurinaitis waved Kane out. Aksana hid behind Teddy. Orton ran out and gave Kane an RKO on the floor though. The distraction allowed Teddy to roll Laurinaitis up and steal the pin. Teddy and Aksana escaped and left the arena, meaning the Kane Aksana match couldn’t happen.
– Kofi Kingston and R-Truth d. Epico and Primo (Truth pinned Primo) in 5:12. Truth and Kofi worked well as a team. Until Primo opened up the ropes, causing Kofi to crash to the floor. Kofi got the tag to Truth, but the referee didn’t see it and put Truth out. The referee did see the tag second time around though and Truth ran wild, leading to the match breaking down. Rosa got on the apron, but her distraction backfired as Kofi kicked Primo, into the jumping flatliner for the pin.
– Cole was in the ring, for an ‘exclusive’ interview with Sheamus and Daniel Bryan. Bryan came out with AJ. Cole asked how much luck was responsible for his success and Bryan claimed he hadn’t been lucky at all. He said he didn’t need luck, because he was so good and listed off a bunch of his victories. He put them down to his application of scientific wrestling, his vegan lifestyle, his charisma and his undeniable sex appeal. Sheamus, unlike Bryan, admitted everybody needed luck. He said he was lucky to be in the USA and lucky to be in the WWE. But Sheamus said he made his own luck and fought his way back to the top. Sheamus accused Bryan of hiding behind AJ. AJ tried to respond, but Bryan told her to shut up in the most fantastic manner possible. Bryan insisted AJ had nothing to do with her success and if anything, she’d gotten in the way, “and I mean that literally”. Sheamus called Bryan an arrogant, delusional wimp and said his luck would run out at Wrestlemania.
– Sheamus, Big Show and Randy Orton d. Daniel Bryan, Cody Rhodes and The Miz (Orton pinned Miz) in 10:48. Everybody got their time in the ring before Miz tagged Cody in to face Big Show, only for Cody to immediately tag out, wanting no part of him. Miz took the brunt of the punishment. Eventually, the heel trio were able to use their numbers to cut Sheamus off. Sheamus made the tag to Orton who made his big comeback. Big Show got his hands on Cody and Cody ran, with Big Show chasing him to the back. Bryan fought into the crowd with Sheamus, leaving Miz and Orton. And to no surprise, Miz lasted no time at all before being RKOed and pinned. Kane then emerged and Kane and Orton brawled through the crowd as the show ended.