This week: We mourn the loss of NXT. Taken from us too soon. A week too soon, in fact, leaving us with a final week of no fancy stuff that Wrestling Is Serious would be proud of. We’ll never have it so good again. Plus, Big Show gets fired which on any other week would be the saddest final chapter to something that’s actually going to be back next week, Triple H gets served and John Cena doing Ace Ventura schtick in 2012.
RAW SUPERSHOW
– HHH showed up at the start of the show, arm in a huge brace. Laurinaitis stopped him and tried to claim he had his support and sympathy for what Brock did. HHH told him good luck with Cena on Sunday and left.
– HHH came out. He said he wasn’t bothered by the physical pain, but he was offended by Brock talking about legitimacy after what he’d done with Undertaker at Wrestlemania. He said that offended everyone from Undertaker to Shawn to Flair to Savage to Sammartino. HHH talked about being a fan and as a fan, Brock offended him too. He said when he first saw Brock, he knew he’d be the next big thing. But when he got there and had to fight to stay there, he quit. Just like he did in UFC. And just like he did after he didn’t get what he wanted from his contract. Brock’s music hit, but it was Paul Heyman who came out, with an attorney. Heyman said HHH was doing damage control because he screwed up and lost his biggest star. Heyman served him with a lawsuit. He then kept goading HHH, which caused HHH to grab him. HHH thought better of attacking Heyman but Heyman, once HHH was a safe distance away, promised to sue HHH for assault as well.
– CM Punk and Santino Marella d. Daniel Bryan and Cody Rhodes (Punk pinned Cody) in 7:22. Plenty of YESing. Punk wanted Bryan in to face him but Bryan neglected to tag in. Punk hit a dive onto both opponents and set them up for Santino, who unfortunately gutted himself on the middle rope. Bryan did tag in once Santino was the opposition. Santino was double teamed and tried to make a Ricky Morton hot tag but, unfortunately, fell short. He did make the tag soon after though and Punk ran wild on Cody. Bryan escaped a GTS and decided to bail on the match. And after being threatened with a Cobra, Cody was hit with the GTS for the pin.
– Beth Phoenix d. Alicia Fox in 1:21. Layla watched from the stage. Beth won quick with the Glam Slam, as Layla looked on slightly concerned. Beth then teased to attack again but Layla ran down and sent Beth packing.
– Kane d. Big Show in 4:09. Laurinaitis came out to watch and David Otunga was back this week, coffee in hand. Kane worked Show over for a while. Show came back and eventually things spilled to the floor, where Show hit a spear. Laurinaitis chose this point to ask for his apology, distracted Show and allowing Kane to hit a sort-of-Chokeslam.
– Laurinaitis continued to demand his apology after the match. Big Show said this had been his life for 18 years. And he could walk away with his held high, but he loved performing for the fans. He talked about making kids smile and making friends backstage and everybody chanted for Show. Show told Laurinaitis not to erase 18 years over something petty and apologised. Laurinaitis told him to say sorry, so everybody in the cheap seats could hear him. That wasn’t good enough and he told Big Show to beg for his job, on his knees no less. Show couldn’t bring himself to do it. Fans were shockingly into this. Laurinaitis promised to reconsider, but changed his mind and started to fire Show. Show cut him off and got on his knees sobbing. Laurinaitis, being a jerk, still fired him anyway.
– Brodus Clay, Kofi Kingston and R-Truth d. The Miz, Dolph Ziggler and Jack Swagger (Brodus pinned Miz) in 3:58. Brodus ran through everybody early on, before Truth was isolated after the break. They showed AW, Rosa, Epico, Primo and Mason Ryan all watching from a skybox. Kofi ran wild and things soon broke down, leading to Kofi hitting Trouble In Paradise and Brodus finishing Miz with the big splash.
– Punk and Alex Riley were talking backstage when AJ ran up. AJ wished him good luck on Sunday. Punk said he didn’t want any of the drama of her relationship with Bryan and basically blew her off.
– Chris Jericho d. Randy Orton by DQ in 5:30. Sheamus did commentary. Jericho used an eyepoke to gain control of the match and worked over Orton. Orton ended up countering a Lionsault and making his big comeback. Orton was sent outside and Jericho goaded Sheamus, before throwing Orton into him. Orton caught Jericho with the hanging DDT and set up for the RKO. But Sheamus attacked Jericho, causing the disqualification. Orton argued with Sheamus afterwards and they decided to settle things in the ring, only for referees to run out and separate them.
– Laurinaitis came back out for his announcement to John Cena. Laurinaitis apologised to Cena fans, because Cena was a loser. He lost to Rock, he looked like a loser after facing Brock and Laurinaitis was better than Rock and Brock combined, so he’d win at Over The Limit. He said the world needed losers, because without losers, there wouldn’t be winners like him. Cena interrupted. He was in jokester mood and Lawler and Cole were stuck in “hey everybody did you notice this is funny” mode. Lawler especially was laughing at almost every opportunity. Poor guy. Cena called Laurinaitis a loser. A lot. Laurinaitis tried not to laugh, which was at least funny. They wasted a whole bunch of time. Crowd were into it, to be fair. Laurinaitis responded to all this by claiming it bothered Cena that he was taller and better looking. Eventually, Eve showed up, needing to tell Laurinaitis something. Cena stole the note, from the Board Of Directors, which said the match at Over The Limit would have no DQs or countouts and anyone who interfered would be immediately terminated. And if Laurinaitis lost, he’d be terminated as well. Laurinaitis slapped Cena and left. This seriously went over 15 minutes. Can only imagine how long it felt for the people who hate Cena with the most passion.
NXT
– The end of an era.
– Percy Watson d. Johnny Curtis in 4:46. The entire backstage attack storyline and the Curtis-Maxine storyline went completely unmentioned. That’s the theme of this show. No blowoffs or story conclusions. That era of NXT is just over. Which sucks. So as far as I’m concerned, Evil Season 2 Percy was responsible for the attacks and nobody can prove differently. Curtis controlled things for a bit, before Percy fought back. But a sidestep allowed Curtis to win with the falcon arrow.
– Great Khali and Ezekial Jackson d. Curt Hawkins and Tyler Reks (Khali pinned Reks) in 6:06. Even Hawkins and Reks as security was completely forgotten slash ignored. Zeke played face in peril, which was something. Khali then came in and destroyed everyone. Almost literally in Reks’s case by falling on him while giving him the Punjabi Plunge.
– Kaitlyn d. Maxine by submission in 6:02. Maxine went for the front choke early but Kaitlyn escaped. She continued to look for submissions, but eventually got caught by Kaitlyn who applied a full nelson with her legs to force a submission of her own.
– Triple Threat Match: Tyson Kidd d. Michael McGillicutty and Derrick Bateman in 12:42. McGillicutty let Bateman and Tyson start out. They soon surrounded McGillicutty outside and forced him in to fight. Bateman hit a dive, followed by Kidd hitting a moonsault to the floor, which he took a lot of the brunt of. Bateman took a lot of punishment as McGillicutty tried to keep things one on one with Kidd. All three tried to grab the win late to no avail. In the end McGillcutty was knocked outside and Kidd applied the Sharpshooter. Bateman almost made the ropes, so Kidd transitioned into the Dungeon Lock. Tyson was a star again here.
– So, that was the show. And the season. And NXT as we know it. No storylines, no wackiness, just matches. Which was as unfitting of an end as the first five seasons of NXT could have. As of next week, the new NXT taped in Florida will take over. Which will be very interesting and possibly very good. But it won’t be quite the same.
SUPERSTARS
– Heath Slater d. Alex Riley in 9:15. After a feeling out process Slater finally got the advantage dropping Riley gut first on the top rope. Slater wore Riley down but Riley caught him with his apron dropkick and made a strong comeback. Finish saw Heath hit a back suplex into a faceplant out of nowhere to snatch the win though.
– Lord Tensai d. Tyson Kidd in 2:30. Tensai didn’t have his Sultan-esque entrance gear here and he shoved Sakamoto on his way out. Not sure if that means anything going forward. “Albert” chants. Tensai overwhelmed Tyson immediately and absorbed all of Tyson’s kicks before winning with the claw slam. I don’t know if it was just because it was Tyson, but Tensai seemed a lot less methodical here. Not sure what that means going forward either, but hopefully it’ll work, because Tensai looked a lot better here than he had previously.
– The Usos d. Dolph Ziggler and Jack Swagger (Jey pinned Swagger) in 13:03. Ziggler did some showing off early, but made the mistake of trying to headbutt a Samoan. Swagger and Ziggler eventually isolated Jey, who managed to get the tag to Jimmy. But he was soon cut off as well. Swagger pulled Jey off the apron at the last second to prevent a tag, but the tag eventually was made and Jey ran wild. Vickie tried to provide a distraction, but Jey escaped the gutwrench powerbomb and rolled Swagger up. Well, that was unexpected. Swagger and Ziggler argued afterwards. Match was fun.
SMACKDOWN
– Laurinaitis came out. He was unhappy about the Board Of Directors decision and he was a lamb to slaughter. He said he wasn’t as flexible as he used to be, despite the fact he could still bench 250 lbs and run a six minute mile. Laurinaitis asked us all to find it in our hearts to support him in his unfair and lopsided match. Like I needed asking! He wanted us to say a prayer for him. Punk interrupted and said everyone would be partying once Laurinaitis was terminated. He ran Laurinaitis down for what he did to Big Show. Laurinaitis took exception to all this and booked Punk against Kane. Once Punk left, Laurinaitis turned his attentions to the fans and said the harder he worked, the more they crapped on him. He blamed all of them for Punk and Cena’s actions and said they could all go to hell.
– R-Truth and Kofi Kingston d. Titus O’Neil and Darren Young (Truth pinned Young) in 3:01. Young gave Kofi a back suplex on the apron to take control for his team. But Kofi was able to tag Truth, who got the pin with the Little Jimmy while Kofi took Titus out.
– Backstage, Damien Sandow passed Zack Ryder shooting for Z! True Long Island Story. He wasn’t impressed.
– Sandow came out, scheduled to face Yoshi Tatsu. He holds the microphone like he’s swilling a wine glass, which is fantastic. Sandow cut a promo about setting us free from ignorance. Two weeks ago he was given an unworthy opponent and, sadly, he was in the same “vexing scenario” tonight. He said Yoshi was unworthy and would not demean himself by competing. Yoshi called Sandow a chicken. So Sandow ran in and jumped Yoshi, before hitting a cross arm neckbreaker. It should be noted that Sandow wears pink tights and purple kneepads. Sandow left, calming himself down and regaining his dignity in the process.
– Striker interviewed Orton and Sheamus about their match tonight. This seemed unwise. Sheamus said he was World Champion, unlike some people. Orton said he used to be overconfident, like one of his opponents, but he knew better now. They continued with their very thinly veiled threats and went face to face. Orton said Sheamus was a nice guy and we know where nice guys finish.
– Daniel Bryan d. Zack Ryder by submission in 2:29. Bryan took most of the match. Zack got some offense in, but Bryan finished him with the YES Lock.
– Kane d. CM Punk by DQ in 8:37. Bryan stuck around to do commentary. Punk attacked Kane’s knee, while Kane focused on Punk’s ribs much to Bryan’s glee. Punk escaped a Chokeslam and fought back. Kane then escaped the GTS. Punk hit the big elbow for two then went for the Anaconda Vice, but Kane got out. Finish saw Punk block the Chokeslam with a roundhouse kick and hit a dive, before Bryan teased hitting Punk with a chair. But he hit Kane instead. Kane won and because Bryan ran off, Kane thought it was Punk who hit him, so he destroyed Punk with the chair afterwards as well. Kane gave Punk two Chokeslams, as Bryan looked on applauding.
– Santino Marella d. Cody Rhodes in 1:59. United States Champion versus Intercontinental Champion. Santino did an inset promo about how much he loved being US Champion. Cody missed a moonsault and Santino set up the Cobra and despite being cut off with a dropkick, hit the Cobra soon after for the pin.
– Sheamus d. Randy Orton in 16:06. Things were evenly matched but tempers soon flared, turning things into a brawl. Orton was sent into the steps. But he sidestepped a Brogue Kick and posted Sheamus’s shoulder, before sending the arm into the bottom steps repeatedly. Orton continued to target the shoulder until Sheamus fought back. Sheamus then wore Orton down for a while, before Orton launched his big comeback. Only for Sheamus to make a comeback of his own. They traded the advantage late, with Orton delivering a big superplex. It turned into a fist fight, before Sheamus crotched himself missing a Brogue Kick and Orton delivered the hanging DDT. Orton then set up for the RKO, Sheamus shoved him off, Orton ducked a Brogue Kick, but Sheamus countered the RKO again and won with a rollup. Really good match. They shook hands after, but Orton struck with an RKO out of nowhere.