TNA: Before The Glory Recap

Abyss is with Dixie Carter, leading her somewhere. He is taking her where “they” have instructed him to take her. They make their way into the Impact Zone and are apparently handcuffed together. Abyss asks Dixie if she prefers Janice or Bob. Eric Bischoff finally brings security to save Dixie. Abyss threatens to “slice” her if security comes too close. Abyss unlocks the handcuffs and slowly walks away. Dixie is led to safety. Bischoff enters the ring and Sting, Kevin Nash, and D’Angelo Dinero come out to confront him. After a commercial, Dinero says that the walls are going to crash down in TNA at Bound For Glory. Bischoff claims that Dinero has no idea what he’s talking about and that he’s going in the wrong direction. Sting takes the microphone and says that his issues with Hulk Hogan will end at Bound For Glory. Hogan’s soul will be revealed this Sunday. Jeff Jarrett and Samoa Joe come out to aid Bischoff but he tells them to back off. Bischoff says that Hogan is in intensive care right now and shows a video to prove it. Hogan has had eight surgeries since February of last year. Dinero, Sting, and Nash are speechless in response. Bischoff makes the match at Bound For Glory a handicap match, with Hogan out of the picture.

Cameras show Mickie James exiting a limo in the parking lot. The cameraman asks her why she’s here and she replies that we need to find out for ourselves.
Team 3D cut a promo in New York City. At Bound For Glory, they will make an announcement that will change tag team wrestling forever.
Opening Match: Angelina Love and Velvet Sky vs. Madison Rayne and Tara
The winning team will receive the rights to “The Beautiful People” name. Rayne and Tara attack before the bell. They hit a tag team russian leg sweep on Love. Rayne tries a headscissors on Sky but ends up being driven into the mat. Love connects with a bicycle kick on Rayne. Love and Sky connect with stereo kicks on Tara for the win at 3:04. The usual effort from the Knockouts. Hopefully their match this Sunday receives time and has some semblance of structure. ½*
After the match, Miss Tessmacher makes Mickie James the special referee for the four-way at Bound For Glory. James comes out and lets every Knockout know that she will be coming after the title.
Dixie Carter and Eric Bischoff are talking backstage. Dixie wants Abyss fired and Bischoff hesitantly agrees to take care of the situation.
Match #2: Last Man Standing: Ric Flair vs. Mick Foley
Jeremy Borash announces this match as “falls count anywhere”. I love this company. Flair immediately attacks and breaks open Foley’s stitches. Foley grabs a barbed wire bat and hits Flair with it. Only took two minutes for both men to bleed. They work their way towards the broadcast table and onto the entrance stage. Flair throws Foley off the stage and through a table. After a commercial, Flair has the advantage in the ring. Apparently, Flair hit Foley with his new book during break. Flair pours some thumbtacks in the ring. Foley back drops him into the tacks. A barbed wire board is brought into the ring. Foley charges at Flair in the corner while holding the barbed wire board. Now a table is setup in the ring. Flair low blows Foley and places him onto the table. He hits Foley with the barbed wire board and puts him through the table with a splash. Flair is too exhausted to stand while Foley makes it to his feet, giving him the victory at 13:23. The finish confused the heck out of me, as Flair put Foley through the table but still lost. They used a lot of plunder and it made this match mildly entertaining. I appreciate the effort involved, but they definitely took some liberties with the ten count and the finish made little sense. **
Flair walks up the ramp but Foley stops him. He demands that Flair kiss his ass. Fortune comes through the crowd and attacks Foley from behind. EV 2.0 runs out to make the save.
Eric Bischoff makes his way to the ring. He talks about the brutality of the previous match and calls out Abyss. After a commercial break, Abyss still hasn’t responded. Instead, Rob Van Dam comes out. He doesn’t want Abyss fired because he wants to fight him on Sunday. Either Abyss wrestles at Bound For Glory or RVD will leave TNA. Bischoff looks on in confusion but agrees to RVD’s demands.
Orlando Jordan and Eric Young are at a carnival. That’s all that needs to be said.
Match #3: Jesse Neal and Shannon Moore vs. Orlando Jordan and Eric Young
Ink Inc. didn’t get an entrance so take a wild guess at who’s winning. The biggest pay per view of the year is in three days and I’m seeing these four go at it. Neal catches Jordan with a dropkick but Jordan responds with sexual gestures. Who’s ordering Bound For Glory? Jordan catches Neal with a spinebuster. Moore eventually tags in and cleans house. He lands a moonsault onto Jordan. Young works against his own partner and stops Jordan from cheating. Jordan low blows Moore for the win at 3:44. Atrocious. DUD
After the match, Young announces on behalf of his team that they are forfeiting. Young offers a rematch at Bound For Glory and I am beyond thrilled.
Dixie Carter and Rob Van Dam are discussing things backstage. Eric Bischoff interrupts and says that at 12:01 on Monday, Abyss is fired.
The Shore, Cookie and Robbie, make their way to the ring. Did I mention that their biggest pay per view of the year is in three days? Robbie says that there are zero hot girls in Florida. They banter back and forth for awhile and dance. I cross the line so you don’t have to…remember that.
Match #4: Bound For Glory Invitational Battle Royal
The winner receives $100,000. Mr. Anderson and Kurt Angle are the first two participants. Without much happening, Jeff Hardy enters next. Once again, without much happening, AJ Styles is the next participant. We head to commercial. Back from break, Sabu, Tommy Dreamer, Douglas Williams, Max Buck, and Chris Sabin have entered. Jay Lethal comes out next. He snaps off a headscissors on Styles. Jeff Jarrett joins the match. Alliteration! D’Angelo Dinero is the next participant. Robert Roode comes out. No one has been eliminated yet and this has been pretty lackluster so far. Sting joins the fray. It’s hard thinking of creative ways to say that someone is the next participant. Another commercial break. Back from break, Jeremy Buck, Raven, and Stevie Richards joined the match. Abyss comes out and eliminates Williams, Sabu, Lethal, Richards, Sabin, and Raven. Everyone else decides to gang up on Abyss. Sting is eliminated as Kevin Nash joins the match and Matt Morgan follows. They have a stare down as Samoa Joe comes out. We’re officially watching Reaction now. Abyss eliminates Nash and Morgan. James Storm joins the match. Generation Me get eliminated by Abyss as Alex Shelley comes out. Kazarian is eliminated. Rhino is the next participant but quickly gets sent packing by Abyss. He also eliminates Jarrett, Dinero, and Shelley. Joe charges at Abyss but gets sent over the top rope and to the floor. Beer Money hit a suplex on Dreamer and do the same to Abyss. Roode tries to eliminate Storm to no avail. They make amends but Abyss eliminates them. Styles catches Abyss with a pele. Abyss eliminates Dreamer and Styles. Hardy lays out Angle with a Twist of Fate and follows with a swantan. Abyss quickly throws out Hardy. He chokeslams Anderson. Rob Van Dam enters randomly. Screw time intervals. He connects with a thrust kick on Abyss. RVD eliminates himself and Abyss with a crossbody over the top rope. Down to Anderson and Angle. They trade punches and tease finishers. Angle hits the Angle Slam, sending Anderson to the floor for the victory at 26:29. This just felt entirely too rushed, even at twenty-six minutes. The ring quickly became crowded due to what seemed like incredibly short entrance intervals and the viewer had no time to digest the action. I also don’t see the value in Angle winning, as I feel he is definitely going over on Sunday. I would have used this as an opportunity to build up Hardy or Anderson. Fine idea but poorly executed…and that phrase also describes TNA as a whole. **
Overall: The purpose of this show was to make me want to order Bound For Glory, the most important pay per view of the year for TNA. To be blunt, Impact sucked in that regard. Aside from some small interactions in the battle royal, Angle/Hardy/Anderson wasn’t progressed in any intriguing way. TNA used Foley and Flair, two men not in Lethal Lockdown on Sunday, to hype that match. Oh, and the Motor City Machine Guns and Generation Me tag title match wasn’t even mentioned. The only good to come from this show was a slight progression in the Knockout’s situation and an interesting twist in the Abyss/RVD feud. Everything involving Orlando Jordan and The Shore was simply unneccessary to feature on a go-home show. TNA hyped this episode as something special and totally dropped the ball. I hope Sunday fares a little better.