This week’s episode is all about Teamwork and what better way to test that than having the contestants play basketball against dwarfs? Silliness aside, there’s plenty of physicality and a spoon-full of drama to boot. Oh, and Rey Mysterio drops by.
Obstacle Course
The show kicks off with trainers Bill DeMott, Booker T, and Trish Stratus bursting into the house and using a megaphone to shout the contestants out of bed. After assembling on the field outside they’re talked through one hell of an obstacle course that will test their strength, speed, conditioning, agility and all that other good stuff. In short they’ll need grit, and perhaps even some hustle. AJ goes first and looks obliterated despite being one of the better conditioned contestants. Ryan goes next and is screamed at by Bill and made to repeat the crab walk over and over again. Luke admits even he had some troubles, which should give you some idea of how difficult it is. Martin does okay, as does Andy, but Jeremiah proves to be an absolute beast and almost manages to catch Andy but embarrassingly falls over before he can do so. Ivelisse needs Martin’s help to carry the heavy bag.
Rey Mysterio Drops In
They’re rewarded for their work on the obstacle course by immediately heading over for training, and wouldn’t you know it, Rey Mysterio is hanging around on the top rope. He treats them to a nonchalant 619 as Luke marks out. Ivelisse takes advantage of the opportunity to ask a fellow small person for advice and he tells her she needs to have the biggest heart.
Daily Training
Training for this week consists of body slamming a big heavy bag ten times in a row. Sounds simple, but isn’t. Martin goes first and is exemplary, earning the praise of Stone Cold. Ryan trips while getting in the ring and tries to brush it off but Bill ejects him and brings AJ in. Ivelisse struggles (notice the theme) and Bill lets her know the bag weighs 70lbs, less than every Diva in the WWE.
They move on to performing a drop down, leap frog sequence and Ivelisse runs under Christina but wipes her face out on… let’s say her waist. Booker lets Christina know it was her fault and it appears Ivelisse pulled her hamstring in the process. Andy is the first to bust out the “this isn’t ballet” cliché while a doctor attends to Ivelisse. Life goes on and other pairs try the exercise but everybody is a little bit awkward, with Ryan being scolded for running in the wrong direction. Trish takes him aside afterward while Bill calls him a danger to himself.
Girl Talk
Trish takes Christina and Ivelisse aside and lets them know they look like the weaker sex. Trish talks about her own injuries and tries to encourage them to pick it up. Christina expresses worries that Ivelisse may believe she’s trying to sabotage her. Mind you, she says this with a huge grin on her face so make of that what you will. The ladies exchange trash talk behind each other’s backs, with Christina telling Ivelisse to ice her injuries and not cry about them, and Ivelisse calling Christina a ballerina. Me-ow!
Dwarf Basketball
John Salley in tha house!!! Nobody else excited about that? No? I’ll move on. Salley introduces them to their opponents for today’s basketball game: 6 dwarves aka The Statesmen. Jeremiah plays his role of naïve redneck farm boy beautifully, putting forth the bigger-is-better ideal. Martin and AJ manage to score early, but then the dwarves take over, and it’s embarrassment city. Eric points out they have nothing to be ashamed of as The Statesmen are a world-ranked basketball team. Ivelisse’s injury hampers her performance and she grabs some pine. Final score: Statesmen 36 – 14 Tough Enough. The challenge was all about team work and they failed miserably, but we got our weekly dose of humiliation at the hands of anyone other than huge tough dudes.
Booker Lays the Smack Down
Booker lets the gang know they were a terrible team and calls out Ryan, telling him not to roll his eyes and then takes it a step further by scaring the life out of him by dragging him up by his shirt, ripping it, and cursing him out. The looks on everyone’s faces were amazing and if you weren’t aware that Booker is a terrifying man before, you are now.
Skills Challenge: Three’s A Crowd
They’re split into groups of three and perform a sequence of moves in round robin fashion with the best member of each trio facing off in a final round. Martin, Jeremiah and Andy go first and as per usual, Martin is the ring general and moves on. AJ, Ivelisse and Christina are next and both girls are terrible and lift only one leg when AJ is coming, unable to jump him. Austin calls it a cluster you-know-what and selects AJ to move on. Eric, Ryan and Luke finish the opening round. Skid-Marks shocks the world by outperforming the heavy favourite Luke and the powerhouse Eric and even Bill DeMott admits he was the best and puts him through.
Ryan blows his opportunity and reverts to his over the top mannerisms and is cut, leaving AJ and Martin. AJ tires out and unsurprisingly Martin wins. Austin asks how many challenges he’s won in a row now and he’s quick to let the Rattlesnake know that it’s three in a row. Luke continues to be the world’s most petulant child by claiming the trainers use a different scale with him than the other contestants and feels he was better than Martin.
Critique & Feedback
The trainers and Austin discuss the ladies first, stating Ivelisse is just barely making it, which is not what the WWE Universe expects from superstars. Newsflash: the WWE Universe expects NOTHING from Divas. Bill makes Austin laugh by stating Christina is just pleased to be in the show, sitting around looking at birds. Trish doesn’t feel she is taking it seriously either. Ryan gets his usual negative feedback. Finally they point out how Martin has schooled Luke for three weeks in a row, and despite being the strongest at the start, he has not progressed.
Ryan and Christina are unsurprisingly selected as two thirds of the bottom three, and then the bombshell is dropped that Mr. Golden Sledgehammer himself, Luke, has been selected. He pouts and Austin calls him on it, causing his usually boisterous voice to regress into a timid, unrecognisable one. He continues his obnoxious behaviour back at the house by asking the other contestants to name one reason why he should be in the bottom three. They smile and keep quiet.
“Come to Jesus Meeting” aka The Bottom Three
Christina is the first in the hot-seat and she talks about her dance background. Austin points out she should be used to jumping but she failed the leapfrog earlier. She feels she’s a better athlete than Ivelisse and Austin tells her to show it. Luke goes next and he explains he shouldn’t be in the bottom three because he’s yet to have had a bad day. He reveals he’s been wrestling for four years and was trained by Tony Atlas. Austin lets him know he’s being outperformed by his good friend Jeremiah, slaughtering the smile on Luke’s face. Austin walks up to Ryan, says nothing, and shakes his head, having heard from him two weeks in a row.
Austin asks Christina about Luke and she says he is physically tough enough but is immature and insecure and may not be able to handle life in a locker room. Austin asks Luke outright if he’s arrogant or an asshole and tells him he doesn’t like him. He finally gets to Ryan and tells him he’s thickheaded for failing to follow the instructions of his trainers. He claims he can hold his own but Austin is quick to point out this is his third week in the bottom three. He asks Ryan what he makes of his dilemma and he turns on Christina as fast as lightning. Austin calls Luke a dipshit repeatedly and mocks his appearance.
Unfortunately for Ryan, Austin believes that three strikes means you’re out and he is eliminated. Christina and Luke are warned they need to show more and Austin shakes Ryan’s hand and wishes him luck. Ryan believes being labelled Skid-Marks from the very start shook his confidence and he never recovered.
Overall Thoughts
One of the strongest episodes of the show so far, we really got the full Tough Enough gamete. The opening physical challenge looked legitimately hellacious and pushed the contestants to their limit. Rey Mysterio appeared for 90 seconds and offered some advice tenuously linked to the episode’s theme. Daily training exhibited how none of them are quite sharp enough for TV yet. The life lesson was funny and did a good job making the contestants look silly. The skills challenge once again grilled the group on their in-ring fundamentals, and the right person won. Furthermore the correct bottom three were selected, and I don’t think anyone could argue the result of the elimination. All of that plus the drama of an injury, some bitching, and a near-fight, it’s realty television folks!
Contestant Evaluation
Martin maintains his spot at the top of the hill and is the most well-rounded competitor, winning almost every challenge put in front of him and maintaining a humble attitude. The only problem is his personality isn’t flamboyant enough to cut it on WWE television and if he does win and the first time a fan sees him is on an episode of Raw or Smackdown they are not going to care about him one bit. Jeremiah is the opposite; he oozes charisma, has a hell of a look, and he’s the kind of wrestler your eyes would maintain focus on. Unfortunately he’s still not quite there yet when it comes to in-ring fundamentals, but hey, that’s the point of the show.
Seeing Luke getting knocked down a peg or three was wonderful fun, and he deserved to be called out for failing to build on his top-notch start to the contest. That being said he looks like he’s come straight from the WWE prospect factory, so despite his unbearable personality, he’ll likely secure a job win, lose or draw.
AJ continues to be Mr. Average, doing just well enough to never get called out, and I really do think that barring a major slip-up, he’ll hang around until the end but has no shot of winning or making it big. Andy is in a similar situation, though he stands a better shot of being a superstar with his size. He threatens to break out every week but has yet to cement it.
Eric isn’t getting scolded like he used to, and he’s another big boy, but you have to think sooner or later he’ll get cut. Ivelisse tries her best but her constant injuries, lack of size, and sub-par conditioning are going to be her downfall. Christina is just athletic enough, and just pretty enough to probably get signed as a Diva, but she isn’t a good wrestler and she puts minimal effort into everything. If I had my way she’d be gone next.