Hello reader! This week’s CHIKARMY Insider features an awesome update from the Badd Blogg, along with the final few matches announced for next week’s Chikara shows. That’s right…they’re next week! Then, I’m gonna get a little sentimental with Classic Chikara, looking back at a Chikara legend who is no longer with the company. Also, a Chikara’s premiere show A Touch of Class is now out on DVD, so I’ll try and trick you into buying it. Nah, I’m kidding; it’s supposedly a really good show. Also, buying it will make you happier than you’ve ever been in your whole life. Magic! Note: I’m note sure why the text is all…chubby. Just increase the width of the page at the top right corner of the screen if it’s a problem. I fix it. I fix it so soon. You see.
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Chad Badd ~ February 19th, 2009 ~ Chikara Blog O’ the Stars
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Word on the street is that there’s a new gang in town. Let me make this real clear! Brad and Chad don’t take lightly to other gangs coming onto our turf.
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It seems that all people are talking about these days is this new crew called the Bruda…something. These guys dress all in white, harbor foreigners and have this fancy little pose. For some reason, that has people runnin’ for the hills with their tails between their legs. You think you’re tough with your preppy suits, and your cute little hand signals? Are we suppose to be shakin’ in our boots cause you’ve given a few guys a light spanking? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SIIIIIIRRRRR! Some people think that there are strength in numbers. How ’bout this for numbers? You got your 8 little members, Brad and Chad got 20 knuckles, 4 boots and 1 Decapitator. Those odds sound good to us.
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Everyone in the wrestling world seems to be focused on the impending domination that this so called “brotherhood” is gonna bring down on CHIKARA. Well I’ve got some news for you kids, Brad and Chad know a thing about being dominant. Over the last 5 months The Badd Boyz have mowed down every single team CHIKARA has put in front of us. For the last 5 months, not a single team on the CHIKARA roster has been able to give us a good fight. We’ve beaten down every pansy that’s had the guts to put up their dukes and fight. We’ve beaten one half of your Campos…or whatever fruity name you have for your tag champs, Fire Ant. We’ve even beat down the newest BDK member, the pussy cat, Lindsey. The Badd Boyz are THE most dominant brotherhood in town!
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This coming month presents us with something a little different. The writing on the wall tells me that the CHIKARA brass are afraid to put us in a 1-on-1 confrontation with any of the other teams on the roster. As it turns out, on Saturday February 27 in Reading, Brad and Chad are stuck in an 8-man tag match. While this usually wouldn’t sit well with the Badd Boyz, there’s a couple of good things about this situation. First, we get to team with F.I.S.T., quite possibly the only team on the roster who gets as much joy out of hurting people as we do. That makes ’em cool! We like ‘em! Secondly, with 4 men on the opposing side, that gives us two extra butts to kick. Incoherence, Portal, you’re in for a long night kids! Frightmare, we can’t wait to get our hands on you, you little twerp. Heard some dudes callin’ you the rookie of the year. After we’re through with you, you’ll be the mat stain of the year.
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If there’s one thing the Badd Boyz are not afraid of, it’s snakes. Ophidian we’re lookin’ right at you! As kids, Dad Badd would take us on Harley rides through the desert. If my brother or I got hungry, Dad Badd would pull over his hog, hunt down a snake and cook it right there on the hot rumbling motor of his Harley Davidson and we would have a family feast! This time though, we plan on eating the snake alive!
February 28 in Pottsville is gonna be just another night at the office for the Badd Boyz. You’re gonna witness more of the same – that’s Brad and Chad takin’ care of business! What kind of business? The business of kickin’ in teeth and takin’ down names. If the Osirian Portal can survive the brutal whoopin’ we’re gonna lay on them in Reading, they’ll never get discharged from the hospital in time to make Pottsville. As for the those geeks the Super Smash Bros… all I can say is that your name is gonna take on a new meaning when we “Super Smash” your faces in with our boots. Claudio and Ares, you’re gonna find out what happens when you come into our yard without an invitation. After we pummel all of those punks, the Badd Boyz will have more than enough points to challenge for the gold and you’d better believe, son, that it’s gonna happen. It’s gonna get ugly kids, Brad and Chad are gettin’ hungry, and we’re gonna forget our manners!
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Things are about to get Badd!
CB
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Player Dos, fresh off of losing his Young Lions Cup to Tim Donst, has to face the odd enforcer of the Order of the Neo Solar Temple, Delirious. It’s clear that Player Dos would prefer to be a singles competitor, but without the ability to ever challenge for the YLC Cup again, the opportunities looks are few and far between. The only other singles title to get regular defenses in Chikara would be Mike Quackenbush’s NWA World Jr. Championship. Dos could make the argument that he deserves a shot at it with a few wins over Chikara veterans like Delirious. For the Bizarre One, this just serves as a warm up for the next night’s title shot with slave driver UltraMantis against the duo of Fire and Soldier Ant.
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The final match announced for Reading will see The Osirian Portal team with Incoherence to face Icarus and Gran Akuma, who failed to recapture the tag titles in their moist recent match, and the Badd Boyz, who enter the match one tag match win away from a title shot. The key to the match will be whether the teams can coexist: The Portal and Incoherence have a less-than-friendly history together and, with F.I.S.T. having to start from scratch and The Badds at the door of a title opportunity, you gotta wonder if they can get along. But what I wonder more than this is…where the hell is Chuck Taylor and what’s it gonna take to get him booked!? Seriously, Taylor is one of my favorite Chikara guys, and it appears that we’ll have to wait until at least March to get some Chuckie T. Not cool.
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Full Card for The Mint Condition
7. Main Event: Eddie Kingston vs. Tursas
6. Mike Quackenbush & The Future is Now vs. The UnStable & Brodie Lee
4. The Colony vs. Pinkie Sanchez, Daizee Haze & Lince Dorado
3. The Throwbacks vs. Castagnoli & Ares
2. Player Dos vs. Delirious
1. Incoherence & The Osirian Portal vs. F.I.S.T. & The Badd Boyz
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The fourth team has been added to the Four Corner Elimination Tag Match, and it’s a dream come true for anyone that thought the Young Lions Cup would end up splintering one of the most beloved tag teams in Chikara. The Super Smash Brothers will return to tag action, and will have a great opportunity to get back into the tag title picture. It took some coaxing from Player Uno, but Dos agreed to compete. It won’t be easy though: they’ll have to get past Bruderschaft leaders Claudio Castagnoli and Ares, the gruntin’ and brawlin’ Badd Boyz, and the two men who beat them for their tag championships, The Osirian Portal. But with Player Uno focused on a shot at the Young Lions Cup the previous night, and Dos clearly not completely game for this match, I don’t see the SSB coming away with a victory. *makes Pac-Man dying sound*
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Vin Gerard and STIGMA have been embarrassed by The Throwbacks several times over now, and they’re sick of it. First, it was losing the epic Baseball Contest to them back at “Hiding in Plain Sight”. Last month, at Chikara premiere event “A Touch of Class”, the Throwbacks & Player Uno pulled off an upset against The UnStable trio. But the Throwbacks are now in a bit of a jam. You see, Dasher Hatfield and Sugar Dunkerton have a match against Claudio Castagnoli the previous night. If they win, that gives them three points and a title shot. However, they won’t have time to cash in with just the three, as they have to get past Vin and STIGMA the next night. Winning gives Dasher and Sugar an irrelevant fourth point, but a win for The UnStable costs The Throwbacks a tag title chance. “We only need one point, to make things happen.” Gerard said in a recent blog. “One point for us equals zero for the Throwbacks.” For the first time in quite a while, Vin Gerard actually has initiative to…try. He wants to screw The Throwbacks out of their title shot and humiliate them the way he’s been humiliated. And with Colin Delaney possibly roaming ringside, they just may succeed.
6. Mike Quackenbush & TFIN vs. Tim Donst, Pinkie Sanchez, Lince Dorado & Tursas
5. Strong-Style Slugfest: Eddie Kingston vs. Gran Akuma
4. Elimination Tag Match: The Portal vs. SSB vs. The Badd Boyz vs. Claudio & Ares
3. Incoherence vs. Death Haze
2. An Unmitigated Massacre: Brodie Lee vs. Green Ant
1. Pour La Vengeance!: The Throwbacks vs. Vin Gerard & STIGMA
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He made his pro debut on October 12th, 2002 at the St. John’s Lutheran Church in Allentown, PA in a match against Phantasmo. He would win the contest on a night that also saw the debuts of Gran Akuma and Eddie Kingston. He participated in the first two Aniversario and Young Lions Cup shows. He had a longtime feud with Blind Rage that saw the rivalry go back-and-forth, much to the delight of the fan. He would win the feud via Bland Rage’s retirement, a definitive victory if there ever was one. Sadly, he was pinned in a tag match on Night Two of the 2005 Tag World Grand Prix, which would end up being his final Chikara show. His star simply burned too bright, causing blindness and (somehow) cataracts in most fans eyes. So he graciously retired. I honor him in this column. Here’s to you, DJ Skittlez. You’ll always have your fan. And your candy.
That’s right; the very first Young Lions Cup match pitted Hallowicked against Skittlez, who was already a fan favorite and in-ring darling. Hallowicked’s behavior is quite bizarre, but it was clear even then that he simply didn’t have the skill and charisma to gain many fans, especially when compared to Skittlez.
Even then, the crowd knew who the true future star would be. Notice how defining the noise is when Skittles calls for his signature Rainbow Bomb, a spinning torture rack powerbomb that Claudio Castagnoli has shamelessly stolen since.
This is, uh….this is just a commercial for Skittles from 1992. Apparently math hadn’t been invented yet or people were just incredibly stupid back then
Just kidding. It’s another commercial for Skittles.
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– A Touch of Class, Chikara’s season premiere show, is finally out of DVD! See eight huge contests including two titles matches: Player Dos defends his Young Lions Cup against “Kapitän Amerika” Tim Donst & The Colony defends the Campeonatos de Parejas against archrivals F.I.S.T. in a 2 out of 3 Falls Match. There’s Pinkie Sanchez in full heel mode, the many transformations of Create-A-Wrestler, the debut of Death Haze, the brutal-sounding finish to Hallowicked vs. Brodie Lee, “skidmark” chants, the Bruderschaft de Kreuzes wrestling debut and the unveiling of the 8th wrestler in the BDK. Buy it today on Smart Mark Video!
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– Please leave any comments or questions you might have and I’ll do my best to respond with as many filthy German phrases as I can conjure. I’d like to do a contest or something cool like that, but I’m not sure how much interest there’d be. Let you voice be heard! Also, let me know if there’s anything you’d like to see in the column like fantasy booking, treasure hunts, wish-lists, secret handshakes, etc.
Hello reader! This week’s CHIKARMY Insider features an awesome update from the Badd Blogg, along with the final few matches announced for next week’s Chikara shows. That’s right…they’re next week! Then, I’m gonna get a little sentimental with Classic Chikara, looking back at a Chikara legend who is no longer with the company. Also, a Chikara’s premiere show A Touch of Class is now out on DVD, so I’ll try and trick you into buying it. Nah, I’m kidding; it’s supposedly a really good show. Also, buying it will make you happier than you’ve ever been in your whole life. Magic!
.
.
Chad Badd ~ February 19th, 2009 ~ Chikara Blog O’ the Stars
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Word on the street is that there’s a new gang in town. Let me make this real clear! Brad and Chad don’t take lightly to other gangs coming onto our turf.
.
It seems that all people are talking about these days is this new crew called the Bruda…something. These guys dress all in white, harbor foreigners and have this fancy little pose. For some reason, that has people runnin’ for the hills with their tails between their legs. You think you’re tough with your preppy suits, and your cute little hand signals? Are we suppose to be shakin’ in our boots cause you’ve given a few guys a light spanking? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SIIIIIIRRRRR! Some people think that there are strength in numbers. How ’bout this for numbers? You got your 8 little members, Brad and Chad got 20 knuckles, 4 boots and 1 Decapitator. Those odds sound good to us.
.
Everyone in the wrestling world seems to be focused on the impending domination that this so called “brotherhood” is gonna bring down on CHIKARA. Well I’ve got some news for you kids, Brad and Chad know a thing about being dominant. Over the last 5 months The Badd Boyz have mowed down every single team CHIKARA has put in front of us. For the last 5 months, not a single team on the CHIKARA roster has been able to give us a good fight. We’ve beaten down every pansy that’s had the guts to put up their dukes and fight. We’ve beaten one half of your Campos…or whatever fruity name you have for your tag champs, Fire Ant. We’ve even beat down the newest BDK member, the pussy cat, Lindsey. The Badd Boyz are THE most dominant brotherhood in town!
This coming month presents us with something a little different. The writing on the wall tells me that the CHIKARA brass are afraid to put us in a 1-on-1 confrontation with any of the other teams on the roster. As it turns out, on Saturday February 27 in Reading, Brad and Chad are stuck in an 8-man tag match. While this usually wouldn’t sit well with the Badd Boyz, there’s a couple of good things about this situation. First, we get to team with F.I.S.T., quite possibly the only team on the roster who gets as much joy out of hurting people as we do. That makes ’em cool! We like ‘em! Secondly, with 4 men on the opposing side, that gives us two extra butts to kick. Incoherence, Portal, you’re in for a long night kids! Frightmare, we can’t wait to get our hands on you, you little twerp. Heard some dudes callin’ you the rookie of the year. After we’re through with you, you’ll be the mat stain of the year.
.
If there’s one thing the Badd Boyz are not afraid of, it’s snakes. Ophidian we’re lookin’ right at you! As kids, Dad Badd would take us on Harley rides through the desert. If my brother or I got hungry, Dad Badd would pull over his hog, hunt down a snake and cook it right there on the hot rumbling motor of his Harley Davidson and we would have a family feast! This time though, we plan on eating the snake alive!
.
February 28 in Pottsville is gonna be just another night at the office for the Badd Boyz. You’re gonna witness more of the same – that’s Brad and Chad takin’ care of business! What kind of business? The business of kickin’ in teeth and takin’ down names. If the Osirian Portal can survive the brutal whoopin’ we’re gonna lay on them in Reading, they’ll never get discharged from the hospital in time to make Pottsville. As for the those geeks the Super Smash Bros… all I can say is that your name is gonna take on a new meaning when we “Super Smash” your faces in with our boots. Claudio and Ares, you’re gonna find out what happens when you come into our yard without an invitation. After we pummel all of those punks, the Badd Boyz will have more than enough points to challenge for the gold and you’d better believe, son, that it’s gonna happen. It’s gonna get ugly kids, Brad and Chad are gettin’ hungry, and we’re gonna forget our manners!
Player Dos, fresh off of losing his Young Lions Cup to Tim Donst, has to face the odd enforcer of the Order of the Neo Solar Temple, Delirious. It’s clear that Player Dos would prefer to be a singles competitor, but without the ability to ever challenge for the YLC Cup again, the opportunities looks are few and far between. The only other singles title to get regular defenses in Chikara would be Mike Quackenbush’s NWA World Jr. Championship. Dos could make the argument that he deserves a shot at it with a few wins over Chikara veterans like Delirious. For the Bizarre One, this just serves as a warm up for the next night’s title shot with slave driver UltraMantis against the duo of Fire and Soldier Ant.
The final match announced for Reading will see The Osirian Portal team with Incoherence to face Icarus and Gran Akuma, who failed to recapture the tag titles in their moist recent match, and the Badd Boyz, who enter the match one tag match win away from a title shot. The key to the match will be whether the teams can coexist: The Portal and Incoherence have a less-than-friendly history together and, with F.I.S.T. having to start from scratch and The Badds at the door of a title opportunity, you gotta wonder if they can get along. But what I wonder more than this is…where the hell is Chuck Taylor and what’s it gonna take to get him booked!? Seriously, Taylor is one of my favorite Chikara guys, and it appears that we’ll have to wait until at least March to get some Chuckie T. Not cool.
.
Full Card for The Mint Condition
7. Main Event: Eddie Kingston vs. Tursas
6. Mike Quackenbush & The Future is Now vs. The UnStable & Brodie Lee
The fourth team has been added to the Four Corner Elimination Tag Match, and it’s a dream come true for anyone that thought the Young Lions Cup would end up splintering one of the most beloved tag teams in Chikara. The Super Smash Brothers will return to tag action, and will have a great opportunity to get back into the tag title picture. It took some coaxing from Player Uno, but Dos agreed to compete. It won’t be easy though: they’ll have to get past Bruderschaft leaders Claudio Castagnoli and Ares, the gruntin’ and brawlin’ Badd Boyz, and the two men who beat them for their tag championships, The Osirian Portal. But with Player Uno focused on a shot at the Young Lions Cup the previous night, and Dos clearly not completely game for this match, I don’t see the SSB coming away with a victory. *makes Pac-Man dying sound*
Vin Gerard and STIGMA have been embarrassed by The Throwbacks several times over now, and they’re sick of it. First, it was losing the epic Baseball Contest to them back at “Hiding in Plain Sight”. Last month, at Chikara premiere event “A Touch of Class”, the Throwbacks & Player Uno pulled off an upset against The UnStable trio. But the Throwbacks are now in a bit of a jam. You see, Dasher Hatfield and Sugar Dunkerton have a match against Claudio Castagnoli the previous night. If they win, that gives them three points and a title shot. However, they won’t have time to cash in with just the three, as they have to get past Vin and STIGMA the next night. Winning gives Dasher and Sugar an irrelevant fourth point, but a win for The UnStable costs The Throwbacks a tag title chance. “We only need one point, to make things happen.” Gerard said in a recent blog. “One point for us equals zero for the Throwbacks.” For the first time in quite a while, Vin Gerard actually has initiative to…try. He wants to screw The Throwbacks out of their title shot and humiliate them the way he’s been humiliated. And with Colin Delaney possibly roaming ringside, they just may succeed.
He made his pro debut on October 12th, 2002 at the St. John’s Lutheran Church in Allentown, PA in a match against Phantasmo. He would win the contest on a night that also saw the debuts of Gran Akuma and Eddie Kingston. He participated in the first two Aniversario and Young Lions Cup shows. He had a longtime feud with Blind Rage that saw the rivalry go back-and-forth, much to the delight of the fan. He would win the feud via Bland Rage’s retirement, a definitive victory if there ever was one. Sadly, he was pinned in a tag match on Night Two of the 2005 Tag World Grand Prix, which would end up being his final Chikara show. His star simply burned too bright, causing blindness and (somehow) cataracts in most fans eyes. So he graciously retired. I honor him in this column. Here’s to you, DJ Skittlez. You’ll always have your fan. And your candy.
That’s right; the very first Young Lions Cup match pitted Hallowicked against Skittlez, who was already a fan favorite and in-ring darling. Hallowicked’s behavior is quite bizarre, but it was clear even then that he simply didn’t have the skill and charisma to gain many fans, especially when compared to Skittlez.
Even then, the crowd knew who the true future star would be. Notice how defining the noise is when Skittles calls for his signature Rainbow Bomb, a spinning torture rack powerbomb that Claudio Castagnoli has shamelessly stolen since.
This is, uh….this is just a commercial for Skittles from 1992. Apparently math hadn’t been invented yet or people were just incredibly stupid back then
– A Touch of Class, Chikara’s season premiere show, is finally out of DVD! See eight huge contests including two titles matches: Player Dos defends his Young Lions Cup against “Kapitän Amerika” Tim Donst & The Colony defends the Campeonatos de Parejas against archrivals F.I.S.T. in a 2 out of 3 Falls Match. There’s Pinkie Sanchez in full heel mode, the many transformations of Create-A-Wrestler, the debut of Death Haze, the brutal-sounding finish to Hallowicked vs. Brodie Lee, “skidmark” chants, the Bruderschaft de Kreuzes wrestling debut and the unveiling of the 8th wrestler in the BDK. Buy it today on Smart Mark Video!
– Please leave any comments or questions you might have and I’ll do my best to respond with as many filthy German phrases as I can conjure. I’d like to do a contest or something cool like that, but I’m not sure how much interest there’d be. Let you voice be heard! Also, let me know if there’s anything you’d like to see in the column like fantasy booking, treasure hunts, wish-lists, secret handshakes, etc.
